I love finding him..

I love finding him.

Walking around in my day

and I find him

in boxes,

cubbie holes,

and linen closets.

He's usually writing, coloring or drawing

me a special picture.

It's usually pictures

of his thoughts.

His dog,

His brother,

His love,

He sketches his thoughts

that

I love to interrupt.

I could write a book
of his thoughts.
So simple is his
love. So very real
the things he puts
to paper.
He loves big (like
his daddy).
I love not knowing where
I'll find him at today but I know
wherever he is, he is
deep in thought.
He's just that way!

Nothing is common...

God is glorified everywhere

in your everyday life.

Thanking the Lord for a sweet Gift

Happy Birthday

Channie Mae

She is regarded around here as a princess.

That's her daddies fault.

He adores his little "flower" and

he makes sure all the rough and tough brothers

knows if they make her cry they answer

to him..

They are gentle with her in a way

that makes me smile though and makes

me wonder why all little sisters

are not regarded as the gifts they should be.

Brothers growing up

just knowing

that

girls are special.

Makes me wonder why all daddies

don't take the time to make

sure all little girls know

that they are a priceless gift.

Living in a large family doesn't

stop my man

from making sure

all the girls in his life know

he adores them and treasures them.

The true gift lies years from now

when my little men grow up and have

wives and daughters of their own one day.

When our little Channie Mae

grows up searching out a husband

who loves her as much as her daddy

and brothers love her

and when she finds him

the gift will be passed down.

The gift we give her on her birthday is small in

comparison to the gift she has been given from her

Heavenly Father.

Life.

Protection.

Mercy.

An earthly father who adores her,

Four wonderful brothers,

Three loving sisters,

and a mom who for the life

of me wonders how

the Lord can be so kind.

Living out the kindness of

the Lord.

2010....

Lessons from the farm:

When you live in the country

you find ways to barter

with your friends and neighbors.

We have friends who

needed a rooster

so we bartered

for their fresh

sorghum.

Great trade but..

We have to catch our end

of the deal..



and it was not easy




Gray was not going to go

willingly

In the end our guys

caught the big gray

rooster..

He's going to a new home

and we have fresh homemade

Sorghum.

I love bartering

but

remember this:

Running down a rooster

is hard work.

Give Me Your eyes for just one second

Give me Your heart for

the ones forgotten.

Give me Your eyes

so I can see what I'm missing.

Give me Your arms

for the broken hearted.

I want to see the world

through Your eyes Lord.

God's kindness

Evidence of God's kindness

to me.

"Dancing around dark corners"

We're living in Hope!

This is the day that our son was born

William White

The little tiny boy

who in his own right

has changed my world

Forever
Holding him

was hard

but it was something

I had to do.

I remember as he was

being born they laid

him on my stomach and I longed

for air to fill his lungs and

hear his cries.

But it was only my cries that I

heard that day.

I held my son and wept.

I could only hold him

in small portions because

he was so perfect that

I would forget that he

was gone.

The last time

I held him I knew it would

be the last time I would

see him until..

...

The way home was so long.

Facing Williams brothers

and sisters was not easy.

Lots of tears. Lots of questions.

Planning a funeral

watching my beloved husband

make hard decisions for us.

I couldn't

Walking out days

that I wonder now how

I even got out of bed.

...

One year later I'm

Trusting in God

Having Hope

Believing

never

forgetting

that I will

see the little boy

again..

and until then

I will dance around

dark corners

trusting in tomorrows

I cannot see.

...

Trusting in the One

God who knows

Happy Birthday baby Willy

born and died on

March 25th, 2009

“Hope and despair are not opposites. They are cut from the very same cloth, made from the very same material, shaped from the very same circumstances. Most of all, every life finds itself forced to choose one from the other, one day at a time, one circumstance after another. The only difference between the two is that despair shapes an attitude of mind; hope creates a quality of soul. Despair colors the way we look at things, makes us suspicious of the future, makes us negative about the present. Hope, on the other hand, takes life on its own terms, knows that whatever happens God lives in it, and expects that, whatever its twists and turns, it will ultimately yield its good to those who live it well. When tragedy strikes, when trouble comes, when life disappoints us, we stand at the crossroads between hope and despair, torn and hurting. Despair cements us in the present; hope sends us dancing around dark corners trusting in a tomorrow we cannot see. Despair says that there is no place to go but here. Hope says that God is waiting for us someplace else. Begin again.”

Was it a mistake? Or a reminder?

A mistake of the hand?

I made one too many

A reminder of the heart?

When we saw an empty place

more than a few tears dropped

on our new table.

I promise

that as long as I live and

have another breath in me

and there are orphans in the world

we will always have extra.

So to all of you who ask the question

"will you adopt again?"

the answer is always going to be

Yes

because of

James 1v27

Religion that God our Father

accepts as pure and faultless is

this: to look after orphans and widows

in their distress and to keep oneself

form being polluted by the world.

Until....

Until tomorrow I'll say good-bye

I'll miss you until

you're back with my heart.

Until then

I will live life making disciples for the Lord

Jesus Christ.

Not playing it safe

but risking it all.

Until...

lessons from the farm

They fit only for alittle while

They wait,

he's coming.

Supper cooking,

Tummies hungry.

I'm able to feed them,

to comfort, to make their

world right as rain.

Their tiny feet standing

in my window sill

waiting for their father,

together. Their life knitted side by side.

One day I can see myself looking back, hair gray, my world changed by the time that doesn't stop and wondering how they all fit so perfectly in the front window of my living room and missing the little people who once stood looking out in the darkness waiting for the head-lights that would make their world perfect!

My memories may one day be faded but I remember now that they fit for only a season and I will not allow it to go unnoticed then.

I noticed and I shall remember always.

Note to self:

I will miss these days

They're cleaning the window of my soul!

They spray and wipe

I smile

They stop and laugh

I 'm watching

They do a job and make it look fun

I'm learning

They spray and wipe

and rub

and fill my soul

with such joy

Just by watching

them be boys!

I love being a part

of their adventure.

Wondering Why?

I get to be her mom!

To Josie

Dear Josie Clarie,

I want to help you to grow as beautiful

as God meant you to be when

He thought of you first.

George MacDonald

I want to always see you

through the eyes of your Creator.

I love you all the way to the moon and back again

Mommie

Is your first thought in the morning ...

"How Best Might I serve My Lord this day?"

We get caught up, covered up in ourselves.

Forgetting

so many around us

could use a little help

to make their load lighter,

happier,

freer to do the things

the Lord requires of them.

A family called

to serve

needing some hands

to serve them..

10 families gave

a day, 10 hours, to fix,

mend, and help.

Will your first thought be

"How can I serve in the mission

field around my home?"

Why must we forget the missionaries

that live within reach??

To the Travers Family, thank you

for serving the Lord and our families.

It was a blessing for us to serve you.

We love you guys!

Little hands making sure the food was good..

Thank you Brodock women for serving while you kept the twins..

They miss you!

Lessons From the Farm

Dear Children,

If we remember that all the trees of earth are marked for the woodman's axe, we will not be so ready to build our nest in them. We should love but we should love with the love that expects death and that reckons upon separation. Our dear relations are simply loaned to us and the hour when we must return them to the lender's hand may be sooner than we think.

Charles Spurgeon

Build a nest but remember, He gave you and continues to give you, all things.

He is the owner.

You are only borrowing from Him.

I learned this lesson most when we lost William a year ago. My heart wrenched when I realized

that William was not mine to keep.

I wish I, as your mother, could tell you that hard times would not come your way. That hard days would not knock on your door. I wish I could tell you that you would not ever cry over loss but if I'm being honest

I would tell you that the hard times, the times when you lose much, God is gently prying your grip on the things of this world.

I will never forget you brother and the lessons I learned..

learning to live without him.

My prayer for each of you is that you never forget the lessons we

learned on the farm as we gave back something that was

never ours to begin with.

Remember to

Love much but

hold loosely.

love,

mom

remembering William Charlie White born March 25th 2009

Raising men to ride the river with.

I can hear them making the sounds of war and guns and I have to admit I love those sounds. The vibrating lips shooting the bad guys that only little boys can imitate. The setting up of a strategic hiding place so you don't get shot.

The little cowboy men spread out over my kitchen table and my little brown eyed men playing pretend.

Playing the good cowboy and sometimes playing the bad cowboy in which mama cowgirl comes riding in saying "you don't want to be the bad guy."

"You want to be the kinda cowboy that is protecting, defending,honoring... Facing evil and calling it evil and then defending righteousness..."

I love having my cowboys around.

I love when:

1.They all stand at their places at the table until me and their sisters sit down.

2.They pull my chair out for me to sit

3.While fighting an out of control brush fire my 8 year old screamed over the flames

"mom you go rest, we've got this."

4.They always bring me a blanket just in case I get cold

5.Always open my car doors

6.Excuse themselves from the lunch table and when asked why

their response "because daddy says it's rude to burp in front of a lady."

I love love love having a houseful of modern day cowboys..

I feel like a queen around all these guys and I feel like the luckiest most blessed

mother of the roughest, toughest,thoughtful cowboys around.

Thanks to their papa who thinks training them to love and respect

their mama and sisters is a command rather than an option out in our

part of dodge.

So to all my cowboys,

I love you guys

remember:

Always be a man to ride the river with.