Saturday, June 20, 2009

One of your biggest enemies as a wife is a immodestly dressed woman

It's been a while since I've been on a trip that involved two airports and a nice hotel but as the

trip started I kept finding myself being very agitated.

I didn't really know why until the last leg of our journey and then it hit me....


So many women 14-30 were showing boobs, bottoms, and anything else you wanted to see.
You didn't have to buy a magazine or pull anything up on the computer, it was FREE...

I diverted my eyes. I changed my direction. I smiled graciously at these women and then I was just mad...

I was embarrassed for these girls. I was angry at the men who had lost their integrity on a short flight. They fell over themselves to help these un-dressed damsels. I noticed wedding rings on almost all of these guys and I just wondered what their wives would of thought of their helpful spirit..:) I was not impressed..I'm sure she wouldn't have been either.

One guy in particular sat next to Scott and I, we found him to be a 48 year old funny likable Christian guy who told us about his wife and kids and how he married up.
(I always think highly of a guy who talks about his family, don't you?)
We laughed with him and had deep conversation about the Lord and our churches etc....
He ruined his whole reputation with me in a matter of 30 secs.
On the way off the plane the stewardess was at the door wearing tight pants and a low cut shirt he stops and tells her how beautiful she was...She smiled and told him how sweet he was.
I wanted to jump in and say "excuse me but your wife may not like you talking like that to other women, I wouldn't like it."

I don't really know what struck me so hard except that he was a husband.
A protector, a provider, a leader of a home...a father, one who is supposed to teach and guide.
and here this guy is telling another woman how beautiful she was, like it was the easiest thing in the world to do..I have to say it made me sick to my stomach......

So I asked my husband what he would do if I wasn't with him and one of these hastily dressed women sat next to him, his response was:

"I'd move"

He said as a man you must and have to train your eyes and your thoughts.

We have alittle rule around our marriage that goes something like this:

We will not be alone with the opposite sex....(flee from the appearance of evil)

We are very careful about how things would look if my spouse walked in or drove up etc.

Call us nuts but I know my husband would never do anything to hurt me or to make me feel
less than his top priority...

Why do some Christian men act so goofy?

Why would they resort to acting foolish for some stranger?

Marriage is sacred. It's intimate, it's beautiful.

The words Scott and I say to each other would never cross my lips to someone else.

Just as I know that the way he looks at me and tells me how beautiful I am he would never say to someone else.

Not because I'm the most beautiful woman in the world but because I'm his beloved and I'm beautiful to him and I am his world.

I know this to be true of his character and he teaches this to our sons.

He used the example of our flight to tell our boys that:

"You will need to remove yourself from situations sometimes that offend you. How would your wife feel if she walked on the plane and saw you sitting next to someone half dressed? There may not be anything at all going on but you don't want to ever make your wife feel uncomfortable, you never want to put yourself in a situation that could effect your marriage in anyway."

I have some friends who are not bothered by their husbands being alone with their secretary or traveling for business with other women, this again is an area in which we don't daddle in.

I also have a friend that her husband refused to work in an office alone with another female employee because they had made a promise to each other to never be alone with the opposite sex. The guy that owned the business didn't have a problem with it and they worked out a schedule so that the husband was never put in that situation. Our friend's desire to honor his wife makes us respect them all the more.

I'm teaching Taylor why it's so important for her to dress modestly.

Do I believe she has to wear long black skirts and a head covering? No, I don't see that standard in the bible, but the standard I do see in the bible is to love thy neighbor. If you're busy loving others you would never want to hurt your actions or your dress... especially the person whom you will spend your life with.

It's been a lot of fun talking with Scott on this subject and I appreciate his leadership in this area.

I'm thankful for his faithfulness in all areas of our marriage and I'm thankful that he honors me when I'm around and when I'm not around.

Remember It's a slow fade:

Be careful little eyes what you see Be careful little eyes what you seeIt’s the second glance that ties your hands as darkness pulls the stringsBe careful little feet where you goFor it’s the little feet behind you that are sure to follow
It’s a slow fade when you give yourself awayIt’s a slow fade when black and white have turned to grayThoughts invade, choices are made, a price will be paidWhen you give yourself awayPeople never crumble in a dayIt’s a slow fade, it’s a slow fade
Be careful little ears what you hearWhen flattery leads to compromise, the end is always nearBe careful little lips what you sayFor empty words and promises lead broken hearts astray
It’s a slow fade when you give yourself awayIt’s a slow fade when black and white have turned to grayThoughts invade, choices are made, a price will be paidWhen you give yourself awayPeople never crumble in a daycasting crown lyrics on
The journey from your mind to your handsIs shorter than you’re thinkingBe careful if you think you standYou just might be sinking
It’s a slow fade when you give yourself awayIt’s a slow fade when black and white have turned to grayThoughts invade, choices are made, a price will be paidWhen you give yourself awayPeople never crumble in a dayDaddies never crumble in a dayFamilies never crumble in a day
Oh be careful little eyes what you seeOh be careful little eyes what you seeFor the Father up above is looking down in loveOh be careful little eyes what you see


Dearest Jessica said...

Great post Robin.

Everyone should be aware that no matter how many rules you set up in your marriage, always be on the look out for possible attacks or things that can harm your relationship.

We are not strong enough ever, and only by the grace of God do we have protection.

We thought we knew it all and that is when we were the most week. Be careful how you dress, what friends you have what kind of additional accountability you have besides your spouse.

Anonymous said...
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CorinneLouise said...
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CorinneLouise said...

Superbly said. I admire the way both of you honor your wedding vows.
Half naked ladies arre all around and the show no respect for themselves as for other in this area of privacy.
I really like your blog.

Bria Cosper said...

A huge encouragement Mrs. Robin! When I flew I noticed the same thing. I hope you and Mr. White had a great time together! We missed seeing you Sunday and will miss you next week too!

Missi said...

I never understood fully the stress and temptation that I was putting on other men by dressing immodestly until I read a read a book written for men (the title of which totally escapes me right now.) It was not supposed to have been read by a woman mind you, but I'm the curious type. ;) It was basically about training your eyes to look away. I suddenly understood it- I'm my husband's secret treasure, made for his eyes alone. When we dress in a revealing or sexy way, it seriously hurts other men and puts them in a desperate situation! Now that I'm married, I really appreciate a modest woman in the company of my husband and I. =D

Heart4Adoption said...

Amen! It is hard to go anywhere at all without being offended nowdays.

Anonymous said...

Agreed. -Andrea

Melodie said...

Very , very well written Robin. My family has raised me well like this and has such a good - pretty much identical - standard as your family has. As a result my godly boyfriend has even told me how much he appreciates how I dress. Modesty can never be overrated and it saves and protects marriages.

Olivia said...

I so feel your anger. On the last trip to Fl. we stayed right on the beach. The public immorality reaks from miles around.The dress of the people there is only a glimpse of what is in their hearts and minds. What convinces a person to run (seriously run) in front of hundreds of people in a bikini? It made me so sick. Needless to say the curtains stayed closed at our condo.

Great post!

Anonymous said...

I love this post! I could NOT agree more!!


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