Thursday, August 15, 2013

Whispering my goodbyes to the wind

My thoughts cannot be put to words.
My once very predictable life has now become one of many changes and, to be honest, lots of tears.
I know that marriage is a beautiful and wonderful gift but letting go of my first born
is like opening a flood gate. It helps me understand my mom a little more.
On the day my brother went into basic training I remember her tears and I also remember the hour drive to where he was doing basic training and she would park us there under a big tree and she would get out and just stand looking at the enormous building that surrounded us and separated her from her first born son. I didn't understand when the wind was cold and the tears were many and yet somehow just being close to where he was comforted her. I knew we weren't supposed to be there but I understand now the need to hold on and the reason we went.
To say goodbye if only whispered in the wind.    
I'm not only whispering goodbye in the wind to just Taylor but also to my oldest son Tucker.
He graduated this year and became an Eagle Scout. He currently has three jobs and so my time with him is different. I'm so proud of the young man he has become and I'm so thankful that he is a light in a dark world. He is such a generous son and the best big brother.

I wish I could remind myself that I have no regrets. I have spent hours training them and preparing them for the world but it's still sobering as a mother to work yourself out of a job. 

 Our household has been busy preparing for a wedding and praying for guidance as I continue to train up the little girls still in my charge.

Johns name has been affectionately changed to Bubba and when he spends hours living up to that name I know he is truly a special guy and a wonderful addition to our family.  

In the middle of change why not start more change?
Like a photography business.
Yep, that's what we did- started a crazy exciting adventure that I absolutely love.
Tucker works along side of me as well as Taylor and John so its been lots of fun and lots of hard work.

Channie-Mae is growing up so very fast and her spirit is so helpful and loving.
She is my main model for new locations and new ideas. I don't believe she knows that Taylor will be moving to Auburn and leaving behind the bed they share in their room. That small space is going to get bigger and well Channie just hasn't realized it yet. She and Taylor have always been super close and her world is about to change. I'm sure we will drive to Auburn and get out and whisper our good-byes many times before it sticks. 
 Cooper bought himself a camera and spends lots of time learning how to edit. He sets up our stuff on shoots and is learning to take over Tuckers jobs.

See I told you we were changing. 

We are still swimming at Aunt Anna's pool this summer and although my two oldest are not with us we must move forward and do the next thing. Having fun is definitely our next thing.

The Farm had baby pigs and Rosebud is doing well.

We got a new puppy named Bella. She is full blooded German Shepherd and we absolutely love her.
She is being raised in the house and well, she is the sweetest dog ever.

We found out that Joe has a rare eye condition and is considered legally blind. His mother in Africa
had an eye condition but it was very noticeable and so I thought Joe didn't have it since his eyes didn't cross. I was wrong. Joe can only see 10ft in front of him and we only noticed because we started doing our home school on the computer and he couldn't see the screen.
His new glasses will correct his vision to a certain point but he will never be 20/20.
Being Joe, he never complained and when he put his glasses on for the first time he didn't stop smiling for a straight 24 hours.

Our family had the opportunity to go to Disney while attending one of Taylor's bridal teas
and looking at the castle reminded me to live happily ever after. 
And to whisper my good-byes to the wind and to keep doing the next thing well.


maureen said...

I have always loved your pictures and your writing! I have links to all of my favorite blogs on my website...yours should be under the category "Guaranteed to Make You Cry!"

Everyone is growing up so beautifully! Maybe you won't be jobless, just promoted from Mother to Grandmother! It's all in how you look at it!

Laurel said...


LOVE all of the pictures.


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